Biji airways

 

 

Good morning, Ladies and Gentlemen.   This is your captain PATEL (Boniface)

 

 

Welcoming both seated and standing passengers on board of Air Biji

 

We apologize for the four-day delay in taking off, it was due to bad   weather   and some overtime I had to put in at the bakery.

 

This is flight 717 to Suva . Landing there is not guaranteed, but we   will end up somewhere in Biji . And, if luck is in our favor, we may   even be landing on your village!

 

Biji AIRWAYS has an excellent safety-record. In fact, our safety standards   are so high, that even terrorists are afraid to fly with us!

 

It is with pleasure; I announce that, starting this year, over 30% of   our passengers have reached their destination.

 

If our engines are too noisy for you, on passenger request, we can arrange to turn them off!

 

To make your free fall to earth pleasant and memorable, we serve complimentary DHARU (country liquor)and Wada paw.

 

 

For our not-so-religious passengers, we are the only airline who can help you find out if there really is a God!

 

We regret to inform you, that today's in-flight movie will not be shown   as we forgot to record it from the television. However, for our movie buffs,   we   will be flying right next to Air India, where their movie will   be visible from the right side of the cabin window.

 

There is no smoking allowed in this airplane. Any smoke you see in the   cabin is only the early warning system on the engines telling us to   slow down!

 

In order to catch important landmarks, we try to fly as close as possible for the best view. If however, we go a little too close, do   let us know.

 

Our enthusiastic co-pilot sometimes flies right through the landmark!

 

 

Kindly be seated, keep your seat in an upright position for take-off   and fasten your seat-belt. For those of you who can't find a seat-belt,   kindly fasten your own belt to the arm of your seat. And, for those of you who can't find a seat, do not hesitate to get in touch with a stewardess who will explain how to fasten yourself to your suitcase."

 

ENJOY Biji AIRWAYS! 

 

 

25 years ago......

A program was ... a television show

An application was .. for employment

Windows were..... something u hated to clean

A cursor ... used profanity

A keyboard was ...a piano

Memory was..... something u lost with age

A CD was... a bank account

If u unzipped in public u went to jail

Compress was something u did to garbage

A hard drive was a long trip on the road

Log on was adding wood to fire

A backup happened to your toilet

A mouse pad was where a mouse lived

Cut.. u did with scissors

paste.. u did with glue

A web was a spiders home

A Monitor was some one who used to keep  watch on classmates in absence of teacher or

A Monitor was class (School's) representative

A Desktop was desk's top surface.

And a virus was the flu!!

... Times surely have changed